Aug 31, 2005
So Confused, So Bullshit.
| Financial Aid problems seem to be a plague among vets and non-vets alike... First, I'm still seeing that a loan is going through to Fredonia for this semester... great. So lets keep giving them money when I'm not even going there... idiots. NYSTAP (New York State Tuition Assistance Program) gave me about $600 a semester for MVCC [tuition is something around $1600]. Which is, by all means, great. That's almost half of tuition. Now I wanted to get the rest of tuition through the same bank that I did with Fredonia... nuh uh. Assholes won't do it. OK FINE. I'll get a direct loan from the college... nuh uh. Apparently the bimbo from that financial office has me signed up for the payment plan that's about $400 a month. That's not THAT much, but when I'm only working 10-15 hours a week... there's no way I can cover that. The TAP award is yet to come in yet... hurrah. The loan is yet to even get looked over. I don't know what I should do! I should just ask for the money from someone and pay them back, but that's just the same as throwing a knife at someone (at least I've been told). Niether mother nor stepfather want me to do any of this. Do it yourself, this is what you get, you put yourself in this situation, serves you right... blah blah blah. How about this, I don't have the money at the moment, probably will have it all before next semester, just cut me a little fucking slack and pitch in? Now it's off to fuck with those twats in the financial aid department! |
Aug 30, 2005
What to do??
| How about my loan has been rejected until I turn in my tax information from LAST YEAR. Great, how about you look on the federal form that I filed earlier... that'd save a lot of time and money. I just recieved a bill for $411 and guess what... I still can't cover it. So onto my credit card it goes, but oh wait, my credit limit is $500? Great, so now it's at least 30 hours a week in order to just cover school. But hold on, gas prices were raised four pennies from the morning to closing time! FUCKING GREAT. So now any plans I had of fun is now out the window. Maybe I'm going to have to start selling some of my stuff... so skis, matching racing suit and an acoustic/electric bass with hardshell case up for grabs.. |
Aug 29, 2005
Cheap Beer, Girls and Drugs.
| Yeah so sociology class has permitted leisure time and nothing but self discussion between myself and some fellow Whitesboro graduates. Topics include: politics, girls, where are idiot classmates are now, girls, money, girls, living on campus instead of at home, girls, how easy this class is going to be, girls... I think i covered almost everything. The new home computer arrives today! Complete with printer/copier/fax/scanner! Yay now I can scan old photos. I can finally show my old action shots of little league, The Mullet, braces, falling out of trees, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle up the ying-yang, and any other randomness that comes into my feeble mind. That is all. [ edit ] nerds rule [ /edit ] |
Aug 28, 2005
These Motherfucking Pigs Are Everywhere.
| SO GUESS WHAT JUST FUCKING HAPPENED TO ME TONIGHT?!?!?!!?!??? Myself and my friend Jay are driving down Genessee street and the speed limit is unposted at that particular stretch... so the unposted limit in New York is supposed to be a maximum of 55... I'm doing 47. Just a little bit of a bitch reminder here from the NYS DMV Manual: Be aware that some cities have speed limits lower than 55 mph (88 km/h) that may not be posted. That's great and all... but when the fuck am I supposed to learn/hear that the limit is 35?!~!? Never during any fucking test or reading the manual have I seen anything that should make me more cautious than 55. So fucko walks back to his car for a good 15 minutes... then walks back up to mine. GIVES ME A TICKET FOR SPEEDING AND INSUBORDINATION TOWARDS AN OFFICER! FOR WHAT?!?!?!? I didn't know that the Utica city speed limit was only 35?!?!?!??? I did nothing else that would warrant that, Jay will attest to that. I turned down the stereo, I asked if he wanted my registration when he only asked for my license. I did nothing wrong but tell him I didn't know that Utica had a special speed limit! BUT NOOO asswipe. Unsubordifuckingnation. I swear if I knew that cunt sucker was going to write me a ticket for that I would've given him so much shit I would have been proud of that fucking charge. You all know I could've jawed that motherfucker out for a good half an hour and deserved a fucking pentalty like that. BUT NOO, I played cool, drive away. Then it strikes me... DO YOU KNOW WHAT FUCKING PARKING LOT THAT DICK WIPE JUST CAME OUT OF??!?!?? DUNKIN DONUTS AND BASKIN ROBBINS fuck me. hard. right in the ass. please. I mean that's all that's really left to happen to me. FUcking hippie motherfucking bitches i swear i'm going to find that asshole and earn that goddam ticket. piece of shit. i'm going to get drunk. even if it takes half the wine and coolers in the cabinet. fucking fuckfaced fucko. |
Aug 26, 2005
Broadcasting Live From Community College!
| Woo, I'm in the school computer lab, I have an hour to kill in between classes!! Hooray for all you poor people that actually read this crapfest! So this is so high school. Or it feels that way rather, my first class today yielded 5 other whitesboro students that either graduated with me or the year after me. Intro to Sociology, that's the biggest bullshit class ever, on a 3 x 5 card we're supposed to write down "one word that describes you best" hmmm i thought... I couldn't put it down to one word... I asked my buddy Jay what I should use. "asshole" he said jokingly......... I penciled that in. That douche wrote "straight forward" for himself. I was severely annoyed "that was 2 words you fucking dick!" He fixed it, by hyphenating the two fuckers together. I told you this was just like high school all over again! We ate lunch after, telling all the girl hit and miss stories over the last year that I was away... more misses than anything... I made a mistake by posting this.... <> adam has a new post |
Aug 23, 2005
Go Go Go
| Today was a big day; I didnt sleep at all last night. So at 7:30 I took a shower and then woke up my little brother because he has school coming up real soon too. I made us breakfast and orange juice. We joked around for a while and then I left for registration and such at 9:00. I spent about 4 hours just standing in lines today, that's five different lines and almost all of them I went back multiple times. I wish those bastards could make things a little simpler. I.E.>>> I start off in financial aid and I'm given 7 forms to fill out and return before I can get any type of loan or financial help. But before I can get any type of help I have to register for classes. So I have to get pre-requisite waivers from a few instructors and I get a step by step walk through of the math class I'm going to be taking (holy shit it's going to be high school math again). So I get all my classes figured out [2.5 hours later]. I go over to get the classes scheduled and holy shit there was no immediate problems, a first. So I go over to the business office and see what I'm going to be paying this semester. $1,672 is my ending balance. GREAAAT. So I have to figure out payment by the end of the day or else my schedule is shit and they release my reserved class spots. So I go back to financial aid and hand in the direct loan forms and this is fucking classic: stupid goddam financial aid whore: "now go fill out this online" me: "but this is for an installment plan" whore: "yes and you're going to need to do that or else your classes are going to be released" me: "but that's why i'm getting a loan..." whore: "just go fill it out" me: [walking away] "this is so fucking rediculous" whore: [shouting] "don't take that tone with me boy!" me: [flips finger] < /scene > So I now have to wait to get an I.D. card *spirit fingers* I'm in line for at least an hour and I'm almost there, freedom is within my grasp... the fucking printer cracks down. NOOOOOOOO so a half hour more of just watching these monkeys trying to fix an ink ribbon... thirty seconds and ~flash~ :print: and [leave] This has been an extraordinarily boring but accomplishing day. Tomorrow holds: buying books (which I have no clue to what I'm getting), turn in my health forms and get my car registered so maybe I don't get towed. Class schedule looks like this: History of Civilization. M 6-8:45 PM Intro to Sociology. MWF 10-10:50 AM College Algebra. MTRF 1-1:50 PM English Two. TR 2-4:15 PM |
Aug 21, 2005
Forgive, But I'd Rather Forget
| where i've come from. I can't believe what I've done to myself. I won't believe it and that's my biggest plight. I've dug myself so far down that I don't want my last failure to be trying to dig myself out of this hole. I'm afraid that I will fail. It's almost assured that I'm going to fail. I can't shake the feeling, everything I've done in my life has turned out so mediocre or so terrible I've given it up. I've nothing to show for 19 years. Whatever effort I've put into any activity has come back negative. I've let down so many people that I only wish I could never do that again. Giving up completely will only be a final let down, and I can't even part this world knowing that's what people will think of me. I can't go on with this life the way I am. I can't take coming home to nothing but negativity, the one place I'm supposed to confide in is the one place I cannot. The one place where critcizm runs highest, the one place where and encouraging word is absent. THE ONE PLACE WHERE ITS SUPPOSED TO MATTER MOST. I can't take this anymore. I have to find it for myself, and every time I try every time I almost get there, I fall short, I'm reminded of something I did wrong in the past and it all comes crashing down and it will always follow me. I almost started bawling when I read isabel's last post because its so much like my own life. It's so much just feeling lost and helpless. I know I'm not lost, but I know I can be helped, but nobody that should would. Nobody that has, has been the one that needs to. I feel like crashing; I'm going down and I do know what it takes to get back up, I CAN DO IT. I just dont understand why I'm going to have to disconnect myself from my family, my few friends to do it. It is not the way things are supposed to be. It never is for me. It never will be, here. |
posted by Mike at 4:18 AM
Aug 20, 2005
You Better Keep A Leash on Your HO Dogg
| The sun sank, the dim sky was palely lit by the clouds that refracted. Gloom and dusk were arriving at the same time. But plans were being made, children were being tucked in. The teenagers all out to their party scenes, the lovers all to their make-out scenes. The few who have nothing to do, go to the movies (for some it is the make-out scene). Comedy over drama, that's what always makes a good date (remember that one kids). Fidgety and holding hands (thumb war progressing), two wait in the lobby for a third. Some people are known to my eye, some to hers, none approach mine, but they approach her. It's a solemn vow, taken by every guy, when with company never intrude upon the other. The lights are dim and the candy sucks, the movie starts and is way too loud. The audience giggles and we hold hands. Every romantic scene draws a gaze and a smile, the never ending jokes of how we first met. The infamous introduction, and the night of my life. Having a ball, still grasping palms, holding in your bladder, as it is going to explode from laughter. The lights regain focus, the applause is imminent, everyone now parting ways, all filing out. The conversations ensue, the longing to be alone with her still the same. Talkative and brash, a few jokes and a decision continues the night. The sky falling down and pouring itself out. Rain drops as big as lottery coins, just feeling so right as they splash down. Fun and defiance are one in the same; both mischievious and frivolous. Kiss me because we'll never kiss like this again, hug me because the time we have is narrowing. Memories rush through and through, that slight smirk still lingering... Time has fast forwarded, I'm saying goodbye? This can't be right, I desperately tell you I love you. I turn away to find myself wishing I hadn't. I race to get back to my lappy, still intoxicated by you. Inspired by the feeling you give me, the Blackness of the clouds against the crimson charcoal of the sky. It's over, the night's done... |
Aug 18, 2005
A Letter I Never Sent
| all the years living just a few blocks away, all the classes where i could only stare. all the busrides where she had the attention. it should have been you all the guys were gathering around. all those times, not listening to a word she said, my attention always fixed on you and that slightest smile you always had, no matter what was happening. all the times they said "she was hot" i always pointed out you. you never had one of those fake ans, or over makeupped face; i was amazed you used any at all. all that time spent listening to her babble is time we'll never get back. i wish i were listening to you. every time you talked i'd always be the first to reply. i hated myself for not asking you to our senior ball, but you told me all about the guy taking you. the first day after, i asked you how it went, you kept going on and on about the time you had. i wanted you to keep going, even though you stopped when he began the lecture. knowing what i do now, i wish you the best, i dont ask for anything else other than talking and catching up on occasion. but i tell you i've dreamed about so much more. i almost gave that to her at graduation, but couldnt... |
Aug 16, 2005
Weekend Delight
| This weekend was so uneventful that it's scary. Saturday, I sat around almost all day. Doing fuck all and nothing. Started swinging my golf clubs and called up my cousin Andrew. Let's go tomorrow morning, about 8am. Fucking A that means I have to wake up early, okay... 11pm rolls around and I find myself on the couch eating a new bag of Dorito's (cooler ranch) and a 2 liter of Pepsi to keep me company. Jurassic Park 3 is airing all fucking night on TNT. So, what the fuck, why not? Just as I'm about to finish off the entire bag, my cell phone rings. Saturday night... cell phone ringing? This might not be good... my neighbor (for whom I was holding a 30 of beer) wants to go out and drink them somewhere; the local park is recommended and voted in. The only problem is, I was holding them for well over a week, meaning that these fuckers were in my trunk, in unbearable heat for 8+ days. WE NEED ICE! Well, let's go to Wal*Mart... we wander around for a good hour, bumped into some of his classmates and he bullshits with them. Just as we're about to call it a night at Wally World his dad walks up to the check out line. F'n A. He does the whole call on the cellphone prank call because we're realy standing right behind you and you have no fucking clue that we're here and whoa look, you're suprised, hurray. A bag of XXX golf balls and a bag of ice later we're heading to Taco Bell. Taco fucking Smell. We sit and eat a quesadilla or two and then make for the park. 2:30am we're drinking beer down by the creek and I end up telling him countless drunk stories from college. He tells me about all the girls making out with each other and him then getting in on the fun. Calls to random people persued and one to somebody I was really hoping would be up, but wasn't but it's okay because she's fun anyways. 5 beers and a half hour later we start walking back up to my house. We're catching up on everything we missed over the last year and what we should plan to do sometime soon. Then it hits me, fuck I have to be up in 4 hours. I come inside and SHIT, my cell phone fell out of my pocket! I had to take another 20 minutes to backtrack and find the fucker. So I get up at 8am with 2.5 hours of sleep behind me and get ready to hit the course. I have a blister the size of a dime all over my thumb. I hit more golf balls with XXX enscribed on them into peoples' lawns they probably thought playboy was in town. A quick 9 holes and 56 shots later we say later and now I have to go to work, fuck. Guess who's sitting in the break room as soon as I get there. Yeah, it's that stupid bitch of a girl that I felt bad about before. She shoots me two death rays and then she looks at me and winks... WHAT THE FUCK. I HATE WOMEN. If I had no decency I would've thrown my drink at her. I finished up worked 6 hours and came home to an empty house. No internet, and a Super Nintendo. FRICKIN SWEET! Sorry about the long post. |
Aug 12, 2005
I was told to do this... so don't be mad...
| 10 Turn Ons. 1) Sense of humor (you laugh you're in) 2) Your laugh (no annoying laughs please) 3) Hair (please don't come sporting an 80's haircut) 4) Kissing (if we can make out for an hour and not have me get bored, you have something going) 5) Intimate Skills (if you can talk me into [our out of] anything... well then you're pretty damn good) 6) PLEASE TELL ME THAT YOU'RE ITALIAN! 7) Music! (please have an open mind to every and any variety) 8) Cheerleader (every guy has the fantasy of banging a cheerleader) 9) Two women wrestling in almost any foreign substance (mud, pasta, and jelly are all favorites) 10) Fireplace (if you have a fireplace in your home, I'm already yours) 10 Turn Offs. 1) "The Social Queen" (if you crave attention from everyone, I won't be one of them giving it) 2) Italian girls who can't cook! (you're going to rot in hell if you don't learn!) 3) The flirts (the girls who'll only let you know that they like you, but never get anywhere with her in a million years) 4) Crying (if it's a crap reason to be in tears, I'm gonna let you know it) 5) Fighting (not arguements, but actual all out fights, ladies aren't supposed to fight!)(this is voided if it's in the aforementioned above) 6) Idiots (if you call and i dont return it, stop calling!) 7) "Relationship hopper" (if you can't live without having a b/f, then don't expect me to fill the void) 8) PMS (you get once a month to use it as an excuse! don't over-abuse the priviledge!!!!) 9) "The Independent" (if we go on a date and you expect to pay, you're not gonna like hanging around with me) 10) If you can't tell me what the fuck binary is and how html works don't fucking try it! (unless you're really hot, then we'll talk about a compromise) |
Aug 10, 2005
Monday Night Or Tuesday Morning
| The biggest video game release of the year was monday night/tuesday morning... here are the events that followed. The names have been changed to protect the innocent... The time that I arrived at operative J's residence, our search and capture mission was just beginning...  Here it is, mission accomplished (action shots are too gruesome and obsene to put online). The HORROR I TELL YOU! STANDING IN LINE FOR OVER AN HOUR, LIKE A HERD OF CATTLE JUST TO GET A VIDEO GAME!!!  Operative J, ecstatic... overjoyed, seemingly forgetting the battle that had prior ensued. To the victor goes the spoils.  Fast forward 6 hours of nonstop playing time and you have 7am. I went home, and then back to bed for 2 hours, operative J is now on a classified mission himself. God speed son, god speed. |
Aug 7, 2005
Act Da Foo!
| I made a Quiz for you! Take my Quiz! and then Check out the Scoreboard! |
Aug 5, 2005
Work Sucks, I Know
| My job blows. Nothing else to explain about it. Come in, sit in random cubicle, strap on headset, start calling people... 5 hours later... leave. That's all there is to it. I think I left out turning on the computer but that's obvious... going on I just recently added my employers' website to my sidebar and I looked through our clientele list and was given a lift as to what I'm doing has such an impact on the biggest names in news and media and blah blah blah... well this is the list:
Yeah so that's just a little tid-bit that nobody's going to read and I (quite frankly) don't blame you. Feel free to add wise cracks and insults where you want/can. It's late, goodnight. |
Aug 3, 2005
Have You Ever...
| Just been so perfectly content with the night that you spent in good company? Having innocent fun and frivolity just ruined by horrible news and depressing thoughts? Tonight and into the morning has been one of the biggest emotional build ups and drops ever. Finding out that you might have finally figured out what love is, found it, and might not get to entertain the curiosity that ensues. Find trouble and nothing but problems from people I've never met, people I've only known a brief amount of time, people... that for some reason I can't help but care about. The people that make my day better for no reason, I try and do the same for others. I try, but I don't succeed all the time, and I feel as if I've failed miserably, and I feel that I can't just sit here as things unravell and people change. Everything is moving in super slow motion and I still can't catch up. I don't know why I feel this way, but I know what love is, I know what it takes to make it work, I know what emotion and time must go into it, I know that the person I love is leaving soon, and I don't know why I'm the way I am. Act the way I act. Do what I do. But this is who I am, I will not make much money in my lifetime, that is something I can see clear as day, there won't be much glamour or fun. But I can't help but want to make a difference. The worst feeling in the world is watching everything happen right in front of you, not being able to stop it, and then being a part of the clean up crew. How am I supposed to sleep at a time like this? |
Aug 1, 2005
Spooning is not illegal.
You's italians couldn't wait for this one could yous? "The action shot" I used to have a pair of nunchuks (or however you fucking spell it)[they were real] I wonder if I couldn't piece together a couple of wooden spoons! That would be the best weapon ever!!! AHHH RUNNN ITS ACTION MIKE AND HIS SPOONCHUKS! WHAM! BAM! OUCH! that would be a good superhero gig...  Apparently this was the 'tyranny' spoon, you know.. the one your mother always threatens to beat you with unless you go brush your teeth. Actually, this spoon is just naturally fucked up from my mom's glorious cooking skills.  Ahhh yes, the tenderizer, only for emergency situations when shit really hits the fan! |