Oct 8, 2008
Tribalation
| Seriously, I'd rather have a great white shark give me fellatio than have to sit through that class again. Hell, I'd rather give that shark fellatio than sit through that class again, who am I kidding? This is the famed Hannah Montana class here people: Seriously, if it's not the students pissing me off. Being a fucking spazz who can't keep his reactions to himself or at least not being such an uptight tool who seems destined to become a door to door bible salesman. Not to mention his incessant love for NASCAR, god that was one tough presentation to stomach. Even worse, was this other jackoff's incessant need to talk about Madden and then fantasy football. Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fantasy geek, I have 2 hockey teams (championship!) along with 2 football and 2 basketball teams. But fuck I wouldn't go off explaining what the hell it is, interrupt the group presentation just to go to yahoo! sign in and show off my team. Fucking christ, sometimes the incessant jock/guy-dom/masochistic pisses me off. Not to mention he thought it necessary to explain what the fuck ESPN is, not only that, but what Sports Center is. Thanks Capt. Obvious, we're working on your promotion to 1st Lieutenant! Fucking clod. Even better, was a girl's reaction to the extremely pig headed moron presenting. The one of eventful rage and interrupting to call him a "fucking sexist pig." I just couldn't NOT have fun with this for the rest of the class. Bringing up cliche's and getting threats and compliments piled from her. Such beauties as "I like you, you're quiet, don't talk and make me want to kill you." Yeah, amazing. Then, she turns to my British friend Mike and says, "I wouldn't hurt you, I like your accent." Only further perpetuating the extreme prejudice that funky accents are cool. So fast forward to two hours later... unfortunately... it's the same fucking class still... and the professor gets to talking about Tiger Woods and his multi-cultural heritage of being tai-black-caucasian etc etc. So the teacher wants to come up with a hypothetical mix... and yes, you guessed it, he writes down that this Mr. X is a quarter Jewish. So immediately I have to intercede and tell him that it's bullshit and Judaism is a religion and not an ethnic background nor heritage. So he basically does nothing deflect the question because he has a Jewish mother. Which I also highly doubt because the guy is NOT Jewish in faith. NOT JEWISH IN FAITH MEANS YOU ARE NOT A JEW. FUCK! Anywho, extremely cute girl corners me outside after class and thanks me for chiming in because that's exactly how she felt too... which is fine, except a little back-up so I don't sound/look like an anti-semite in the middle of class would've been more helpful. So awkward silence ensues, BritMike chimes in that we should start drinking in a few. I agree, notice that she's still standing there... apparently I was supposed to say or do something else... I think I'm the master at promoting awkward silences and situations with girls. It's a gift. But the obvious truth, is that I don't want that with anyone else other than smurfette. |
posted by Mike at 5:42 PM
