Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.

Woman: Oh, I see.

Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please?

Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.

Traffic Cop: Don't have one?

Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Woman: I can't do that.

Traffic Cop: Why not?

Woman: I stole this car.

Traffic Cop: Stole it?

Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Traffic Cop: You what!?

Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious?!

Officer: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing that it's empty.

Officer: Is this your car, ma'am?

Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The traffic cop is quite stunned.

Officer: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls a card out of a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license quizzically.

Officer: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner!

Woman: Bet the lying son of a gun told you I was speeding, too.